Text 27 Oct A squirrel was hit by a car infront of a place where anti-abortion protestors are picketing.

Picky, picky.

Photo 26 Oct 7,664 notes Tumblr garbage. Apparently there is no WORD for it in French, either. 

Tumblr garbage. Apparently there is no WORD for it in French, either. 

(Source: this--too--shall--pass)

Text 26 Oct 23 notes It was nice while it lasted

maltyk:

The boy finally ‘let one go’ in front of me. Guess we are there now.

There’s very little funnier than a fart. But a girl’s reaction to her guy’s first fart might just top it. 

via Malty.
Photo 26 Oct What is my hair doing… c’mon!

What is my hair doing… c’mon!

Text 26 Oct I was late for work today

But really, work was too early for me today. 

My boss didn’t like that idea. But he’s German, save for how best to be scary when doing simple things, what does he know?? 

Text 25 Oct Being a fat guy who deals with taxes… I dunno, it sends the wrong message .

I dunno! Are YOU being audited?! That’s a very private question. Just because you’re a “Tax Master” does not mean you can ask that.

Text 24 Oct Jack and Jill went up a hill to make a terrible film

It’s with Adam Sandler,
And in all due candor
His career, I hope, he did kill.

Photo 18 Aug 9 notes maltyk:

Trying to wake the fuck up

Love.

maltyk:

Trying to wake the fuck up

Love.

via Malty.
Text 16 Jun 4 out of 5 Noah’s agree.

Fact: Any commercial wherein the actor claims to be a “fertographer” is bad, and you should not buy that product. I’m looking at you, Crest.

Video 13 Jun [Flash 10 is required to watch video]

I woke up this morning, MORNING mind you, to this invasive mess pervading my house. Nothing has been altered about this video, even though I really wanted to. 


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